Friday evening. Drive down to the mountain with team of 8. Team decides that appropriate name for team is ‘Dad’s Army’. Platoon dinner at Fat Pigeon, with beers. Maybe trip will be easier than I thought. Arrive at historic ‘Camphouse’ at North Egmont (shifted onto the mountain in 1891). Very pleasant.

Saturday 7 am. Porridge with prunes courtesy Captain Mannering (aka John D). Delicious. Weather perfect. 25 km/hr wind forecast for summit. Trip looking better all the time.

8 am. John’s son Phil arrives with three Taranaki Alpine Club friends. Young people and their damned young bodies.

9 am. ‘The Puffer’ track is too easy so Platoon opts for Razorback instead. Above Humphrey’s Castle Chris puts down a bag of warm things. Golly, things keep bouncing a long way down on this mountain. Young person sent down to search but no luck. Someone else loses a glove in the wind. Camera case goes same way. Note to self: always bring two of everything.

10 am. Stop to put on crampons. A few technical issues with hire crampons. Phil and others help fix. Start up snow face (starts half way up scree slope). Pretty easy so far. This is fun!

11 am. Getting steeper. Snow more icy. Stu tells me these are “primo conditions for cramponing” (technical climbing term). Must know what he’s talking about because just re-elected to Regional Council.

11.30 am. Cross the bit of the Lizard that is still poking through the snow. Didn’t realise that ground could be this steep without being vertical. Someone tells me later it is only 40 degrees but have serious doubts about their geometry abilities. Don’t panic! Don’t panic! Front pointing most of the time, feels safer that way, but calf muscles are having serious argument with brain. Brain is in the wrong. Share pain notes with John Grace. Not sure of time, feels like 5 pm.  Lots of helpful encouragement from rest of Platoon. Note to self: climb Te Aroha 10 times before next Taranaki climb. Allan being a great ‘tail end Charlie’ and giving lots of good tips and encouragement. Quick rest on ice axes, and wait for slow pokes to catch up (me). Breath-taking view. Taking care not to look straight down too much. Slope appears endless.

1 pm: Reach crater. Relief! Fantastic ice sculptures on Sharks Tooth and summit.  Short climb to summit. Fantastic views and feeling of achievement. Lunch.

2 pm. Start descent. This is so much better but still just as steep.

4 pm. Platoon hunts for Chris’ lost bag at Humphrey’s Castle. Allan finds it in a gorge, and Chris retrieves it.

5.30 pm. Back at hut. Collapse. Shower. Pub for beer and dinner. John G complains because no wheelchair available at pub. Chris shouts a round due to hunt for clothes bag. Damned fine chap.

Sunday: More porridge. Coffee and sticky date/strudel at Volcanoview café. Drive home.

Rest of week: Learn to walk without using calves. Great sense of achievement. Note to self: in spite of destroyed calves and petrified moments clinging to mountain, good decision to ‘just do it’. 

Thanks to Trip Leader John Davies. Fellow Platoon members Stu Kneebone, John Grace, Paul Quinn, Peter Burgess, Allan Wickens, Chris Kay. Special thanks to Phil Davies and his friends for their local knowledge and youthful energy.

Diarist: David Ray.  A complete set of photos from this trip is on our facebook page.